Monday, February 13, 2012

Three Diagnoses for The Cost of One

As I looked down on the doctor’s checkout form, in the doctor’s scrawl I saw, “Sinusitis” and on the line below that, “Obesity”. I’d only gone to see the doctor for what I thought was a sinus infection; but he’d thrown-in an additional diagnosis at no extra charge.

He wasn’t my normal doctor, but the ‘head’ of the group I use—my normal doctor wasn’t in or was booked or whatever. I was in pain, and I didn’t feel well; I wasn’t about to be picky. Besides, it was his name on the practice, that’s got to be good, right?

As soon as the doctor had confirmed my suspicions of the sinus infection I was ready to go; but he wasn’t ready to let me go. He transitioned—I didn’t know it was a transition at the time—with a perfectly normal ‘doctor question.’

“I see you list heart problems with both parents. Tell me about your Mom’s heart problem?”

So, I did. I quickly relayed an abbreviated version of my mother’s heart attack and the conscience of its cause.

“I see. What about your Dad?”

I’d too quickly become annoyed and hoped my answer showed it. “He’s dead.”

I feel he sensed by annoyance, but was not to be deterred. “What about his heart problem?”

I relayed an even more abbreviated version of my father’s heart problems, and my opinion on their cause—namely being a life-long, heavy smoker.

As I finished, his head was still bobbing an ‘I understand’ head-bob. In silence for nearly a full minute (How much is that in billable dollars?), his head continued to bob as we starred at each other. Perhaps he was waiting for me to finish or perhaps he was plotting a next step, or perhaps that was just his style.

He broke the silence, “With your family history, your age, and your weight; you need to really pay attention to your heart’s health.”

My glib, “What about my liver?” was not what he was looking for, and he cast me a disapproving scowl.

Without my knowledge or consent, the transition period ended. He deftly moved into the next topic of his—as yet unknown to me—diagnosis. “I’m also going to prescribe you a brochure.”

“Um, OK?”

His look this time clearly expressed annoyance that I’d interrupted him. He continued as though I had said nothing at all. “It’s about a movie I’d would like for you to watch, it is widely available and you can even watch it for free on their website.”

“Um, OK?”

Again, he continued undaunted by my unnecessary prolonging of the last “a” sound in ‘OK’. “It about a movie, a medical documentary really; it’s called Forks over Knives.

He didn’t ask if I’d seen this instant cult classic, so when he took a breath, I volunteered that I had already seen it.

OK, I’ve already given you way too much back story, so let me summarize the rest.

The doctor would pull from the movie some plot point that highlighted the medical value and importance of this ‘special diet’.

In response, I’d share why I felt that the conclusions amounted to unsubstantiated leaps to blame or credit based only on food choices, and presented a misleading picture.

He’d offer another piece, and I’d counter.

We verbally sparred for several minutes until I finally stood up, allowing my body language to announce I was done.

It was later that I noticed he’d “diagnosed” me with obesity, and the next day when I realized what an important lesson he’d unknowingly given to me.

Now, already far into this post, the lesson—“Most evangelists suck at evangelizing!”

“What?!?” Would be a logical question of exasperation. It isn’t easy to see how food could be tied to evangelists. But…

The ‘special diet’ that doctor was espousing was a vegan diet. I realized that every vegan I’d ever met was either an evangelist or a zealot. I don’t get this feeling from vegetarians; it has only been in my encounters with vegans.

Over the years, I’d encountered many different types and styles of evangelism in an effort to ‘win people over’ to one Christian denomination or another. In general, the efforts didn’t appeal to me, but they didn’t really bother me either…their style just wasn’t for me.

But, in my life, there is a real and significant difference (beyond the purpose, of course) between the evangelists for religion and the food evangelists—I was, on some level, interested in (or at least not opposed to) the topic of religion. On the contrary, I was not only uninterested in a vegan lifestyle, but was opposed to it. I’ve not been annoyed by the evangelist committed to his view of how to save my soul, but was quickly tired of and angry with the person who was equally passionate about his view of how to save my life.

As this percolated around in my mind, I started comparing different eating lifestyles and my perception of how they lived out their choices and drawing comparison to different religions and how they live out their choices; and, of course, how each chooses to promote it…to evangelize.

Right up front, let’s say it. There are crazies in every category, so let’s just do what I do in real life—ignore them, don’t make eye contact and hope they go away. But to be fair, often times, these crazies (or zealots) genuinely believe they are doing an invaluable service for the world and that they are doing it in the best possible way. Of course, that’s part of what places them on the ‘crazies’ list.

From my conversation with the (very committed) doctor, and my time of pondering after; I was reminded that you can’t talk people into that which they aren’t interested. The old adage of “You can catch more flies with honey…” reminds us that starting a health conversation with ‘you’re fat’ isn’t setting the stage for a positive talk. In much the same way, neither is ‘you’re going to Hell’.

When put in a position of defense, human nature it to defend, even when the position is indefensible. For most, we continue to defend a position that we may not even believe in any longer, but feel somehow honor bound to stand behind it with the best defense we can muster.

If human nature—call it the ‘sin nature’ if you like—directs us toward refuting and rebelling against that which we are opposed to or with which we do not agree; then the vast majority of the weapons in the average evangelists arsenal only have effect upon the already converted. I’ll say it again—most evangelists suck at evangelizing. Don’t even get me started at the damage done by zealots!

This post is already long—even by my standards—and I really can’t understand why you are still reading it (but I certainly appreciate it). But, I’m not quite done yet…

I shared earlier that my experience has shown that vegans and vegetarians live their food lifestyles very differently, and in turn share their lifestyles very differently. In gross generalizations, let me tell you how I see them.

My experience with vegans is one of encountering highly passionate people who are committed to their way of life, and feel theirs is the ONLY acceptable way of life and any other choice is simply wrong and must be corrected. Their food choices flow over into every aspect of their life and become a focal point—a point of separation and classification. In many cases these choices become insurmountable obstacles to any meaningful relationship—except with already likeminded individuals. To the best of my knowledge, I’ve never met a vegan who didn’t almost immediately tell me (through word and/or action) that (s)he was vegan.

Contract that with most of the vegetarians I’ve met. I would suggest their commitment is just as real and solid as the most passionate vegan, but for the most part, they view their food lifestyle as a personal choice—a choice that may not be right for everyone. I’ve eaten meals with vegetarians, but didn’t know they were vegetarians—because they didn’t make a big deal about it. Rather, it seems to me, their testimony comes as a response to how they live their life. By that I mean, I’ve asked questions based on what I’ve seen. This could be obvious things like consistent food choices; or less obvious things like weight or perceived fitness. Or it could even be something in passing, like: “How come everyone’s gotten what’s going around by you?”

One is the guy standing on the busy street corner wearing the sandwich board with the megaphone shouting “Repent, The End Is Near”. The other is the studious worker, who draws others to him by a positive attitude and inviting smile. One is shouting a message that many more may hear, but to which no one is listening. The other is inviting others to take an interest in order to share that what makes them different—the saving knowledge of the one Christ.

Before you stand on the corner or even ‘canvas a neighborhood’, take time to consider that the vast majority of folks who you will encounter are not only uninterested in your message, but may even be opposed to it. Given that, consider if there another way—perhaps a more effective way—of sharing the ‘Good News’. Is there a way that you can have a more meaningful impact on someone’s life, even if that means, in the short-run, you may encounter fewer folks?

Perhaps it is still a numbers game, but maybe—just maybe—we need to pay attention to a different number.

As I draw to a long overdue close, I should tell you that in the past I’ve toyed with the idea of become a vegan, but I’m now farther from that potential than I have even been. But, I think I could be happy with a more restrictive diet than I currently have. Hummus, I like hummus….it might be worth looking at balancing my diet with far fewer meats. Maybe.